I have been reading The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky. I do not believe I was ready to read it before, though I tried several times. But now I am truly amazed. Every page has depth, riches, and profound psychological and spiritual characters studies. And the descriptions of life in 19th century Russia are utterly fascinating.

Perhaps I am ready to read this masterwork because I have been diving into Eastern Orthodox Christian spirituality. My mind and heart have been coming alive as I’ve explored the Divine Liturgy, monasticism, prayer, and the lives of the eastern saints. Naturally, this has led me to the Slavic (especially east Slavic) countries and their lived experience.

And then this passage caught my attention. It is showing the mind of Alyosha, a novice in the local Russian Orthodox monastery and the hero of the story:

Oh, how well he understood that for the humble soul of the simple Russian, worn out by toil and grief, and, above all, by everlasting injustice and everlasting sin, his own and the world’s, there is no stronger need and consolation than to find some holy thing or person, to fall down before him and venerate him: “Though with us there is sin, unrighteousness, and temptation, still, all the same, there is on earth, in such and such a place, somewhere, someone holy and exalted; he has the truth; he knows the truth; so the truth does not die on earth, and therefore someday it will come to us and will reign over all the earth, as has been promised.” — from The Brothers Karamazov

I think of how desperate we all are to know that somehow the promises of God are true, that they will be fulfilled someday, and that He can be trusted. I look at myself and see a wretched sinner and I think the world cannot count on me to be holy enough or faithful enough such that truth will not die on earth. But if I am not attentive I might think of myself as different than that simple Russian and start to believe that, perhaps, I don’t need the saints. But I know in my heart the world needs holy people, saints, living and dead, that can be counted on. And as I see them I see too that the promises of God are true and good.

[published on the Feast of the Holy Cross]